You may not be dating or father material, but she may not want either of those things at the moment. You just have to approach it in a different manner.
For many of my readers who are in their 30s or 40s, this idea can actually be more attractive than the thought of starting from scratch, going through pregnancies, diapers, screaming, and sleepless nights.
In its simplest form, it means men only see women as saints or prostitutes, and there is no in-between.
Either way, just because you started dating her does not mean you automatically get the right to meet and get to know her child.
Being a kid, especially to a single mother, is always a confusing time, and it’s the job of the mother to ease everyone into it. She wants to make sure you’re going to be around for at least the immediate long run before bringing you into her child’s life.
She may love some rough sex, a little choking, or anal — things that you may not associate with a mother. Also, she may not have been getting a lot of sex in the last few years, so she may be eager and excited to take out her frustrations on you.
A final point to this is she may just want a friend with benefits. Dating a mother will be more complex and complicated than some other relationships you’ve had, but it can also be more rewarding and have the potential for amazingness.
Instead, say to her “So I was thinking about what to do this weekend, and what about after you feed Katy her breakfast and the sitter comes over, we go to the State Fair for the day?
We could go on some rides, take pictures of the animals to show Katy later, eat a lot, and play some games.Maybe she and the father have an amicable relationship and co-parent and she will never be looking for another father.It could be that she just likes spending time with you and will see where it will goes.Over the years, I’ve dated a few women who had children (technically, I’m dating one now as my wife just gave birth to my daughter!), and, while it can be a great experience, it’s a whole different bag than dating a childless woman. Kid just coated themselves (and the walls) with Mommy’s makeup. Her high-schooler just got caught sneaking out of the house. Having a child is like navigating portions of calm in between storms of activity.That way, I can win you and her some prizes to take back, and we should be able to get you back for her bedtime.” The fact that not only did you do some thinking and planning, but you also made sure her daughter was front and center to those plans will go a long way in proving what a great man you are.