“A little bit late to start figuring out how to have an orgasm, but whatever,” she jokes.
So she began to teach herself (and eventually others) about men’s bodies, about how antidepressants can affect libido, about the ways in which people who live with cerebral palsy and other conditions can have sex—and eventually started a blog, The Fucking Facts, to address some of those questions. There’s no funding here to look at sexuality, so it falls on the hands of whoever is comfortable talking about it,” she says. But these portrayals still exist on the fringes, and finding them is not easy.And although there’s more information out there now than when she started at Venus Envy eight years ago, she’s still longing for more pop culture portrayals of disabled people being sexy. *** Pop culture, from which we take so many of our sexual cues, has been sorely lacking when it comes to realistic depictions of sex and disability.By 19, she’d fallen into a pattern of only making out with men when she was drunk.In university, she would panic when someone showed interest in her at a bar.“So I did what a lot of marginalized people do—I pretended I wasn’t different.” Related: By the time she was ready to be sexually active, Trace was no longer in a wheelchair.
But she was using two canes to walk, and still had to contend with bladder and bowel issues.“It looks like I was designed to have one leg, like a mermaid’s body,” she says.Dixon looks every bit the poised, self-possessed Olympian, and she was—except for one area of her life in which she felt painfully insecure.Because she is missing her leg, she also has only half a bum and half a pelvis, and she was worried that her vagina was disfigured—she’d never compared hers to anyone else’s.Growing up in Brampton, Ont., Dixon’s sex education came entirely from friends (and one incident where, at her mom’s insistence, she and her older brother practiced rolling condoms onto bananas).“Say someone wants to take you home—that is an awkward f-cking conversation,” Dixon says.