Either way, we won’t be together anymore, and that’s sad. Rachel is a Christian and I am a heretical Jewish humanist. Christians and people of other faiths are different. I never will be that woman, and while I can understand her, empathize with her, feel pretty in her clothes, and love her deeply, I will never really know the depths of her experiences or the convictions of her beliefs.How can we fully be together when we don’t share the same spirituality? Christians of different denominations are different. No one will, except God (if you’re into that sort of thing).I wanted to make sure these points were said upfront, as some are missing the point of this article altogether, happy reading!
Do they overshadow the age old wars like the fight for the TV remote or what restaurant to eat at?Typically, these separations become evident when couples talk about: Genesis 22:2-3 Then God said, “Take your son, your only son, Isaac, whom you love, and go to the region of Moriah.Sacrifice him there as a burnt offering on one of the mountains I will tell you about.” Early the next morning Abraham got up and saddled his donkey.He took with him two of his servants and his son Isaac probably would have flipped out at hearing God’s request as Isaac was her only child, given to her by God at the age of ninety no less!They grow toward each other by learning about and respecting their differences, and then stay together by willingly meeting each other’s needs, whether they fully understand them or not. That love is what my interfaith marriage is all about.
Rachel would call that the manifestation of God’s love and grace in our marriage. Not because I have some fancy Ivy League degree hanging on my wall, nor because I’m a published marriage counselor—no, I’m a marriage expert because I’ve been married twice. My first marriage was to a lovely woman of like-spirituality. I know this, because my second wife, an even more lovely Christian woman named Rachel, told me so.I’m a big believer in the school of you-don’t-know-it-until-you’ve-done-it. We were both humanists (which is a fancy term for do-gooder atheists) of Jewish descent. Rachel also told me that our marriage is a resounding success, and I believe her.His wife said to him, “Are you still holding on to your integrity? ” He replied, “You are talking like a foolish woman. ” Hmm, if someone we love was struck with some horrible disease I would hope that we would pray for them non-stop, but instead Job’s wife gives him the amazing advice to “curse God and die” Now wouldn’t that would be the best “Get Well” card to send someone, I wonder why Hallmark hasn’t swooped in on that “We heard you were sick, so from all of us at the office: “Curse God and Die!Queen Latifah was born as Dana Owens in Newark, New Jersey.How can we unleash the full potential of our marriage if we have a spiritual chasm between us? (If anyone knows Pete, or why he cares about the children, please let me know in the comments—oh, and tell him I want back my copy of As tempting as it was to ignore the problem of our differences and hope it went away, Rachel and I talked about it, and decided that since we valued our marriage too much to leave it to chance, we would be proactive about addressing our differences: we’d do it the hard way. I don’t want to be her Savior, I want to be her husband.